How to Finger Yourself and Experience a Breathtaking Orgasm

A woman pleasuring herself
Close up of woman’s hand touching her abdomen

The stigma surrounding fingering is lifting as sex positivity and sexual wellness becomes more prevalent. People from all ages, genders, sexualities, and relationship statuses are finding happiness from fingering.

People sometimes complain that masturbation isn’t for them. However, if practiced correctly, masturbation can be an enjoyable experience. Fingering yourself can help you relax and relieve tension, boost your sex drive, and improve your overall sexual satisfaction.

If you masturbate regularly, you will enjoy intercourse with your partner better. This is especially true if you regularly practice oral sex on your partner during sex. Fingering yourself is safe and non-invasive, less expensive than regular sex, and makes it easy to control your sexual urges. Do you want to learn how to finger yourself for the first time? Well, it’s super easy for a beginner!

Let’s get to it!

First Time Fingering Tips For You

The following are the steps to follow if you’re fingering yourself for the first time:

Get Your Mind In The Game

What is in your mind during fingering will influence how you feel. If you are stressed, you will not experience pleasure and probably not get an orgasm. That’s why you should tune your mind into a relaxed and sexy state. One of the ways to do this is by thinking sexy thoughts. You can masturbate to your favorite porno or go online and find hot videos that arouse you. 

This can help you get out of your rut by stimulating all of your sexual instincts.

Reach Out For The Lube

Although for women the body naturally produces fluids that get you aroused, lubrication may not be enough, and it can cause a lot of discomfort during fingering. If your genital area is dry or not well lubricated, it causes a condition called micro-tearing, which makes an individual experience pain during and after sex. The common causes of vaginal dryness include:

  • Stress
  • Some medications
  • Aging

This is where the lube comes into place; applying a lubricant before fingering will reduce any friction and enhance your pleasure. There is no limit to the amount of lubrication to use. Remember, the wetter the pussy is, the better the masturbation will feel. You can quickly get a lube online from sex shops and amazon, or you can even get it from your local store.

Get Started

Now that you have your lubrication, it’s time for you to start exploring your genitals. Before you go down there, ensure your hands are clean to avoid transferring bacteria to your genitals. You will want to have a comfortable place to masturbate; one of the best places is in your bedroom because you will have a lot of privacy. 

For a beginner, one of the best positions to start masturbating is where you lie on your back with your legs spread. It will be easy for you to find your clitoris and familiarize yourself with it with this position. Get one or two fingers and start touching your clitoris; the best side of your finger to use is the top side because it’s soft and gentle. 

Try different motions while touching your clitoris; one of the best is drawing small circles around the clitoris. Another motion you may try is the see-saw motion. For this motion, you will move back and forth the clitoris. 

Slide In

Start with the middle finger and either the index or ring finger. Slide your fingers in your pussy and stroke your upper wall, a couple of inches deep: you should be able to feel your G-spot. Work your fingers together, in and out of your pussy in a “come hither” motion. Work your way around your pussy, masturbating it, occasionally touching your clitoris with your thumb or another hand. 

Make small circles with your index finger. This stimulates the g-spot and can also help to make you come. Also, try running your fingers along the sides of your vagina, as it can help to stimulate your G-spot.

You will feel an orgasm in the sides of your vagina. This orgasm is caused by stimulating your G-spot and possibly massaging your clitoris.

Clean Up

Once you have had your series of orgasms, you should clean up immediately. This will help eliminate any bacteria you come into contact with and prevent any vaginal infections. 

How To Finger Yourself For Men /Gay

A person demonstrating how to finger using a doughnut
A person demonstrating how to finger using a doughnut

Society teaches men that they should derive sexual pleasure from their external genitalia and that women should derive it from internal stimulation, but this doesn’t seem right.

Mainstream sex culture has done everyone a disservice; men can orgasm by stimulating their prostate gland inside their bodies. The prostate is located 2-4 inches inside the anus; it rests behind the anal ball and sits just underneath the bladder. Stimulation of the prostate gland provides different types of orgasm appeal when combined with male ejaculation. Do you want your male g-spot pleasure, here are four ways to achieve this:

External Massage

Did you know that it’s possible to stimulate your prostate without having to go inside your body? An area between a man’s scrotum and anus is called the perineum. Apply a rhythmic firm deep pressure to this area before you start fingering. The anus has many nerve endings; hence touching this area will cause a lot of pleasure. When conducting the anal massage, you ought to be relaxed; taking deep breaths will enhance your concentration.

Use Your Finger

Here you will start entering your body from the anus. To avoid scratching yourself, you want to make sure that your nails are well-trimmed and filed. Remember to apply lube to avoid hurting yourself and make you experience more pleasure. Insert 2-4 inches of your finger and move it in a come hither motion. While doing this, explore the inside of your butt; you will start to feel the walls of your butt contracting. It’s upon you to adjust the speed and pressure of your fingering according to your liking. 

Achieving the Prostate Orgasm

If you aim to achieve a prostate orgasm from fingering your butt, there are different ways to position your finger to achieve this fit. The trick to achieving this is always curving your finger towards the direction of your belly button because that’s where the prostate gland is located. For example, if you are lying down on your back, you will want to curve your finger upwards; if you are lying on your stomach, you will curve your finger downwards. 

Use Toys

There are a wide array of sex toys designed and shaped specifically for prostate stimulation. You can search them on google or find them on sex shops. 

How To Finger Yourself Without Hurting 

Some people experience pain when masturbating, though it can be relieved. However, there are times when the pain is severe, and it may cause a lot of discomfort if you finger yourself. Here are some ways to alleviate the problem.

Use Lubrication

When a finger or toy gets inserted into the vagina or ass, it tends to be dry. Thus, friction can occur between the finger and the inside of the vagina or ass – friction which can cause pain. However, adding lubrication to the finger can help with this problem. Types of lubricants used include petroleum jelly or K-Y Jelly.

Wear a Ring or Bracelet

 A ring or bracelet can prevent the fingers from rolling into the vagina/anus and causes less friction during fingering. 

However, the type of ring or bracelet that works best will depend on the person. Some people prefer soft rubber rings and bracelets, while others prefer metal or leather.

Some people may feel like they have too much gauze when wearing rings. Use what works best for you. 

Use a Vibrating Sex Toy

Using a vibrating sex toy during masturbation, which stimulates both the clitoris and the G-spot, can help minimize some of the pain when fingering. The vibrations help the clitoris and G-spot to “wake up” a bit, increasing arousal and minimizing some of the pain felt when fingering. 

A Sex Vibrator
A Sex Vibrator

Use Ice Cubes

Ice cubes, used in conjunction with ice packs on the fingers or hand, can decrease fingering pain. Ice packs can be used as an alternative to ice cubes, or they can be used in addition to the ice cubes. 

Wear a G-Spot Stimulator

Wearing a G-Spot stimulator, such as a G-Spot egg or G-Spot Wand, during masturbation can help to increase sensitivity in the G-spot area, reducing the pain felt during fingering. Wearing a G-Spot stimulator can also increase the level of stimulation experienced during fingering.

Use an Air /Water Massager

Using an air/water massager during masturbation can stimulate the clitoris and the G-spot, which can help to minimize the pain felt during fingering.

How to Finger Yourself In The Shower

Knowing how to finger yourself in the shower is a somewhat intimate act that anyone can enjoy, regardless of gender or sexual orientation. 

Make Use of The Massage Showerhead

A massage showerhead is a hand-held attachment that allows for much more interactive play in the shower. The showerhead has dozens of little massaging jets that can be turned on or off, so you can use it to tease as much or as little as you want.

Another great way to use the massaging showerhead is to stimulate your G-spot. You can use your fingers to achieve the same effect, but the massaging showerhead is stronger and more penetrating. Doing this will allow for more pleasurable stimulation, as well as increased orgasms.

Get In The Right Position

One of the great things about masturbation in the shower is that you can enjoy it from just about any position.

Ideally, you will want to sit, squat, or kneel in the shower. This will give you better access to the whole of your genital area. However, if you want to finger your hole, you may want to kneel.

You can also enjoy masturbating in the shower while standing, sitting, or lying down. The options are truly endless, especially depending on the way your shower is designed!

Work in Some Lube

Once you have the shower head in hand and you’re in the proper position, it’s time to get some lube. There are many lubes on the market specifically designed for use on sensitive skin, so find the perfect one for you. Make sure you use plenty of lube, as it will make you masturbate in the shower (or anywhere, really!) much more pleasurable. 

Use a Vibrator

A vibrator is a wonderfully sexy addition to masturbating in the shower. The vibration will get things started and increase the intensity of your orgasm. There are many different types of vibrators out there: some vibrate just your clitoris while others vibrate your whole sexual area. Explore and have fun!

How to Finger Yourself With Acrylics

Some women like to use their acrylics when masturbating. Using acrylics is just like fingering yourself normally, but these false nails can provide more stimulation than just your fingers and are great for prolonging the pleasure. 

Others want to use them to stimulate the G-spot. Acrylics also come in a wide variety of colors, from solid to glow-in-the-dark ones. You can even get acrylics in the shape of dildos or vibrators!

To use your acrylics, first find a position that’s comfortable for you. Sit or lie down on your back and prop yourself up on your elbows. This will help give you leverage for your fingers. You can also use a vibrator or dildo for added stimulation. 

Begin to stimulate yourself with acrylics. First, push one finger in all the way, then back out an eighth of an inch. As your fingers go in farther, you should start to feel a vibration. 

Some people like to use multiple fingers at the same time, as this can make your orgasm more intense and provide more stimulation. Using your fingernails to massage different parts of your body is also a great option. You can even make patterns on your body by using your fingers with acrylics.

Acrylics are a fantastic option for people who have trouble reaching orgasms independently.

How to Finger Yourself as a Virgin

If you’re a virgin and want to finger yourself for the first time, you will be thrilled to learn that there are several ways of doing this. As a young virgin, you’ll want to make sure that you get sexually stimulated and enjoy fingering for the first time. There are various means to accomplish this feat. They include:

Get to a Comfortable Place

Before you finger yourself for the first time, make sure that you’re somewhere you feel comfortable. Find a very private place where you can be totally alone. When you finger yourself for the first time, you’ll want privacy.

A lady preparing for a fingering session
A lady preparing for a fingering session

Find a Good Position

You also need to find a comfortable position before you start fingering yourself. You can try different positions and move throughout, but try to make sure that the position you pick keeps you as comfortable as possible. For example, if you want to feel pleasure, make sure that the fingering position you choose ensures that your fingering won’t cause you any pain.


When you finger yourself for the first time, you need to make sure to use a lubricant. Use a safe oil intended as a lubricant – this will prevent the majority of discomfort and pain when fingering yourself for the first time.

Take Your Time

When you first finger yourself, take your time. Only use one finger when you enter yourself – there may be a pinch of pain. Allow yourself to adjust before doing anything else. A lot of pleasure is headed your way, so take your time. Don’t try to rush it.


 Try to control how much pressure you use when you first finger yourself. You don’t want to hurt yourself, so make sure that you can control how much you apply.

Use Different Fingers

Try experimenting with other fingers to see how different fingers feel while fingering yourself first.

Now that you know all about fingering, how about you move into your bedroom and try it out! Fingering can also be coupled with massage sessions like the happy ending massage.